A Boundary Setting Activity: Communicating Your Needs With Confidence

Laura Nickel • March 6, 2025

How horses help clients practice healthy boundaries


We hear a lot about boundaries these days, but knowing you need to have them, and knowing how to actually put this into practice is a different thing all together. When a person learns how to handle a horse safely and correctly, boundary setting becomes a necessity. 

Did you know that horses are actually very respectful of boundaries? Horses are masters at nonverbal communication, and boundary setting is one way they communicate love and respect. The more you communicate this back to the horse, the stronger your relationship with them will be. The best part of this in EAC is that you can “experience” boundary setting which is the best way to learn! 

Why boundaries are important in our world with people. Boundaries keep people safe, and keep us from stressful and difficult situations. Unfortunately, I have seen all to often, young people, especially girls, unable to be assertive enough to set boundaries. Perhaps they were taught that obedience was more important than assertiveness. When people are able to set and communicate healthy boundaries, it fosters healthier relationships. Just like with people, boundaries with our horses can create more authentic connections with them.

When we set boundaries with our horses, we are safer, and the horse feels more comfortable and relaxed. Boundaries are not about power and control, but rather, about respect, connection and safety. What does this look like when interacting with a horse? 

First and foremost, take the time to observe horses in a pasture. Learn how they use their tails, ears and body language to communicate to each other. For example, their ears are pinned back, this means they are uncomfortable or angry. When you enter into the field to get your horse, notice when if become visibly uncomfortable with your presence. Just like with people, On some days they may have a larger “bubble” around them., not wanting you in their space. Others days it will be small, other days they may come running toward you. The better your connection and trust is with your horse, the smaller their “bubble” will be. Remember, you also have personal space. Your horse should always be respectful of that, and certainly, if they attempt to bit you, they are not respecting you or your space. Hopefully, they will have learned early on that that is not acceptable. When you halter your horse and lead your horse, they should understand to respect your space. You teach them your boundaries by what you permit them to do. Sound familiar? This crosses over to human interactions as well. 

EAC activity: Here is an activity clients can do with a horse to practice boundary setting. 

Preparation: in a designated area, like an arena, set up an obstacle course using objects you may typically find in an area, cones, barrels, posts. This should be a path, large enough for the human and horse, but narrow enough that the horse needs to understand the directions of the person. Ask the client lead their horse through this course, clearly communicating their direction and maintain their personal space. Try this with a lead rope, and then “at liberty”. At liberty is with the horse off the lead, allowed to move freely. Observe how the horse responds to different energy levels, and boundaries set by the client. Note the energy and intention of the client. 

Safe Handling Tip: due to the nature and sometimes unpredictable nature of horses, these activities should only be done under the supervision of a qualified coach in a safe environment. 


The EAC Coach may ask reflective questions based on observations, but always respectful and nonjudgemental. For example, the coach may ask, “ can you name how you felt when….what was the thought behind that feeling?….Would you like to feel differently? What would it take to feel differently? What happened when…what is working? What is not working?How did the horse respond when..? How did your energy and intention align with your request? What did this activity teach you? 

Safe Handling Tip: due to the nature and sometimes unpredictable nature of horses, these activities should only be done under the supervision of a qualified coach in a safe environment. 


By Laura Nickel March 25, 2025
Why and How I Partner with Horses on the Path to Wholeness About fifteen years ago, I found myself at a crossroads, a point where life felt stagnant and ineffective. It was then that an unexpected opportunity arose: leading a Horse Trail Riding Program at a camp. This experience ignited an awareness within me – the healing power of horses. It wasn't just about my own personal relearning; I recognized the immense potential these magnificent animals held for helping others. This realization sparked a deep dive into the world of Equine Therapy, Equine Learning, and Equine Coaching. I immersed myself in books on trauma, somatic healing approaches, breath-work, grounding, and mindfulness, driven by a desire to understand how to bridge my background in Child Development with the transformative power of horses. This journey has culminated in a unique and effective approach, one that prioritizes relationship healing, emotional regulation, and the alleviation of anxiety and stress. The result of this dedication is a practice where I guide individuals in rediscovering their courageous, creative, and knowing selves. We humans possess an incredible capacity for resilience, for recovering from life's inevitable bumps and bruises. Yet, sometimes we lose our way, needing a compassionate guide to lead us back to wholeness. Experience is our most potent teacher, and horses serve as remarkable healers, assisting individuals on their journey of self-awareness and self-discovery. Scientific studies have demonstrated that simply being in the presence of horses can balance the brain and facilitate healing for both mind and body. When we cultivate a connection with ourselves, we naturally connect more deeply with others and the world around us. Investing time and energy in inner healing and self-improvement is an investment in our overall well-being. Early attachment issues and stress can manifest in various ways, including sensory integration challenges, attention deficits, and impulse control problems. Neuroscientists have discovered that stress and trauma can alter the brain's pathways. Fortunately, these pathways can be healed through reconnection. Partnering with a properly trained professional and bonding with a horse can significantly improve brain balance. Horses naturally regulate our breathing and blood pressure, offering a non-judgmental presence that encourages us to live in the present moment. By utilizing horse psychology and carefully observing the interactions between horse and participant, I help increase awareness of internal and external experiences. I act as a facilitator, observing and assisting the flow of energy and intention. The horse, in essence, mirrors the participant's inner state, allowing me to guide them towards an understanding of underlying currents that may be hidden from conscious awareness. I do not judge or provide solutions; rather, I create a safe space for participants to process their thoughts, beliefs, behaviors, and patterns. Purposeful activities, combined with techniques like breath-work, meditation, and relaxation, are designed to foster self-discovery and joy. Horses are sentient, relational beings, responding to our energy, intentions, emotions, and movements. We partner with these mystical animals to reintroduce love, vitality, and joy into our lives. Together, we explore, play, relate, reflect, and process, uncovering what holds us back and what we need to move forward as happier, healthier individuals. In our coaching sessions, you will partner with a horse to connect with your inner and outer communications, finding healing for your heart, mind, and soul. Some potential outcomes include learning to trust yourself and others, releasing negative reactions, developing courage and leadership, and finding creative solutions to challenges. You define your goals, set your course, and follow your own path, while I coach you alongside a horse who will be your guide on this transformative healing journey.
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