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During her first equine-assisted coaching session, we started by observing the horses. Jennifer was drawn to certain ones, and we discussed their interactions within the herd. She witnessed a mare assert dominance, chasing another horse away from the hay. Then, another horse stepped in, defending the bullied one and ensuring they had their share. We explored the horses' nonverbal cues and how they communicated, laying the groundwork for understanding emotional dynamics.
After a thorough safety briefing, Jennifer began grooming Lucky, our affectionate paint horse. Despite his size, Lucky immediately connected with Jennifer, lowering his head to nuzzle her. I then guided Jennifer through haltering and leading Lucky, preparing for our work in the arena.
In the arena, I asked Jennifer to place three cones, each representing a significant challenge in her life. She could share these challenges with me if she wanted, but it wasn't required. With sticky tape, we labeled the cones. Jennifer revealed her challenges: a bully at school, math difficulties, and her little brother.
I asked her to lead Lucky around each cone. Notably, Lucky showed resistance when approaching the cone representing the bully, becoming distracted and attempting to graze. He had no issue with the other cones. We discussed this observation, confirming that the bully was her primary concern.
We concluded the session with Jennifer riding Lucky, focusing on basic riding skills like balance, seat, and rein handling. Jennifer enjoyed the experience, leaving with a sense of calm and newfound confidence.
In our next session, we focused on grounding techniques using her five senses while brushing Lucky. We then introduced the “Your Jedi Horse” game. We brought out the cone representing the school bully. I asked Jennifer to lead Lucky around the cone while focusing on the negative self-talk she experienced regarding this challenge. We identified these negative beliefs and explored a list of positive attributes. Jennifer chose “fearless” as her empowering attribute.
I introduced her to Lucky as her “Jedi Horse,” embodying the quality of fearlessness. As she walked him around the cone, visualizing the challenge, she experienced no resistance.
We then practiced a "heart math" activity. Jennifer placed her hand over her heart, took deep breaths, and recalled a time she felt courageous—learning to swim. We visualized her breath circulating around her heart, clockwise on the inhale and counterclockwise on the exhale.
Over subsequent sessions, we incorporated activities to build confidence, mindfulness, breathwork, and positive thinking, all while fostering a fun connection with Lucky. Jennifer applied these skills, becoming more assertive and confident at school. The bully’s influence diminished, transforming from a major challenge to a minor obstacle.
Certified Coach, Founder & Owner of HeartSong EAC